Revelation 4

I've been praying about being stuck in the sin of the world - praying that God will grant me the wisdom to see my errors and be patient while I learn how to fix them.

Sir Smiley is learning how to walk and watching his progress really pulls on my heartstrings. He is just too nervous to let go and move! He finds comfort in crawling because it's familiar and he knows he can do it.

Aren't we all like that? If we just learn to trust in Him, we'd be fine! He will take care of us! If only we could take that first step to walk out of what is familiar and comfortable...

I'm very exciting about reading Chapter 4. The splendor and beauty of Christ's throne revealed. To go through and explain how I feel would be both time-consuming and insufficient. I am enchanted by the most overwhelming worship ever. Voices raised as one, light and beauty, all for Him. I still can't wrap my head around it.

vs 2 ... I was caught up at once in deep worship and, oh! - a Throne set in heaven with One Seated on the Throne.

After yesterday's readying, I had the song "I Can Only Imagine" stuck in my head ...

I can only imagine, when that day will come, and I find myself standing in The Son. Surrounded by Your Glory, what will my heart feel? Will I dance for you, Jesus, or in awe of You be still?
Will I stand in Your presence, or to my knees will I fall? Will I sing HALLELUJAH - will I be able to speak at all?

I can only imagine ... I can only imagine...

The truth is, I CAN'T imagine it AT ALL! The idea of being in the Lord's presence is too big for me. In our everyday life, we have drama. As I have grown as a Christian, most of my drama I have been able to pray my way through: finances, homeschooling, sub-standard housing, ailing parents, etc. but I also have real human pain and a Mama's heart. It makes me sad if a friend is experiencing hardship or pain, and it makes me sad when my children are hurting. Even if all they do is fall and skin their knee, I get a little teary-eyed. (Although, I always tell them to brush it off and get back to playing - I'm NOT raising wimps! LOL)

To imagine all that pain GONE, fears GONE, worry GONE, frustration GONE ... to imagine that by it self is difficult. But then to multiply that by adding worship?

Wow.

No ... no, I can't imagine it at all.